Quote:
Originally Posted by Lups
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rob340i
Just found out my wife of 12 yrs is pregnant with our first she is only 1 month in so she wont let me tell anyone yet. So i had to get it off my chest.
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Okay dude, play it cool. Here is the things you can expect and you're bound to fuck up.
1. When she has morning sickness (never call it that, it comes and goes with most women!) you need to know it's your fault and you need to have crackers or other wheat based treats ready everywhere. Those aren't the healthiest things in the world but you don't want your baby to be born in jail right?
2. All the fucking crying that comes along: Either take that like a man, or be killed in a divorce. You can control the LED lights on euro settings in bad conditions on automatic settings better than you can the waterworks.
3. She can lose weight, or gain it massively, but no matter what, she feels like shit through the first and second trimester. Your basic job is to pretend you still want to have sex with her even when she doesn't want to.
4. On the last trimester read the three first ones, and think of those rules as 3x more important. She will drive you nuts, and then someone you know who is already is divorced tells you it will be easier when the baby comes out: He is divorced for a reason.
Best of luck. And when she acts up in the weirdest ways, pm me and I'll translate it to you. I'm pro at telling men what they're missing when the women freak you out. |
Wish there were a dummy's guide for dad's to be. This is golden advice
