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I think the big thing is whether or not you want a powerful engine i.e. 35i and the less powerful one i.e. 28i that will get you better gas mileage. Test drive until you have a good feel for the car and maybe see if you can rent one for a couple of days. Don't let the sales man rush you. Also, iDrive controller is rediculously complicated, so don't worry, it will take time to master. If you really like the car and you don't want it loaded, then deciding which options you want is tedious, and the dealer will probably not be all that knowledgable on the smal details. The one thing I found out about BMW is that many people order the specific options they want. You can order almost any option individually or get the option packages. There is nothing worse than spending 45K or 55K (US $) and discovering that you didn't get the top view camera that you would have loved, or the Storage Packager, Comfort Access, etc ...
As far as the X3 goes, I love the car and the handling but I wouldn't say it's the most relaxing, luxurious comfortable car to drive, but it has more of a sporty, high tech feel especially for a vehicle of it's size and class. Also, if you go for the 35i and you like to drive step on it, your gas mileage goes down fairly quickly.
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